Douchelords, Stop Telling Women What to do On Instagram
/To the men who feel like they have the right to comment on what a woman should or shouldn’t do - please, mansplain a little more, we need to know about our own motivations.
Really, I mean we’ve been so lost this entire time without you - but thankfully, we have YOU now to explain everything! Please, tell us more about what we should do with our bodies and the REAL motivations behind what we do!
Or, maybe it’s about time to come to terms with the fact that, women can do whatever the fuck they want and you have no say.
Maybe, it’s time to come to terms with the fact that our societal thinking is so fucked that people still feel okay to slut-shame, to label certain woman as “confident” and others as not purely based on the level of skin she chooses to reveal on social media.
Maybe it’s time to understand that slut-shaming, a social stigma applied to girls who are perceived to violate traditional expectations for sexual behaviors, is an oppressive institution, it’s interconnected with a lot of other oppressive habits, and it’s still far too accepted in our society.
Maybe it’s time not to forget that a female’s sexuality is still treated much differently than a male’s - if a man bares it all with a picture of his six packs/biceps/bulges, he must be “confident” “assertive” -
God forbid a woman chooses to expose herself in the same way and she must be, “lacking confidence” or “suffering from a lack of self-esteem.” As one fine gentlemen puts it, “Posing in a lace bra and a G-string on Instagram doesn’t give the perception that you are a “lingerie model,” it makes you look cheap, like the only value you offer is your body. The psychology behind your behavior in taking these nude pics is very straight-forward: you’re suffering from a lack of self-esteem and are looking externally to make yourself feel good about you. But you’re kidding yourself.”
Thank you sir, we’ve been so lost without you.
The same guy goes to preach that women should not sell their integrity and self-esteem for the price of “an affirmative click here if you think my pink parts are pretty!” He states that they will only attract the wrong kind of guy that way, and are selling out women everywhere. Lol.
How about it’s about time to understand that the objectification of women is caused by the one objectifying, similar to the way a woman is never “asking for it” because she chooses to wear revealing clothing.
Or how about maybe, just maybe, how a woman chooses to dress and behave, *gasp* has nothing to do with a man at all? How about the women who post revealing pictures of themselves are just truly proud of their bodies? Proud of their sexuality and sensuality?
Why should a women feel bad for looking good, for feeling sexy, for owning her body and femininity? Why can’t she post a picture simply because she likes it?
The bottom line? A woman should be able to do whatever she wants with her own body - being naked is empowering for some, being fully clothed is empowering for others. But passing judgement on what a woman does with her own body will always be 100% unacceptable.
So here’s my idea: stop being a little fuck. Stop assuming you know someone’s life and motivations based on a picture. Stop validating your own prejudices and stop telling women what they can and cannot do.
We need to stop shaming women on Instagram. When you accuse a woman of seeking attention, of having low self-esteem, of being "slutty" or objectifying herself for choosing to do something with her own body, you are actively participating in slut-shaming. Slut-shaming is an oppressive system, it's harmful, and maybe you aren't even aware how interconnected it is with a lot of other oppressive systems such as victim-blaming and rape culture.
Why is it so harmful? The more a woman feels ashamed for her choices about her own body, the more she is likely to feel like SHE'S done something wrong, like somehow she deserved it, in the face of sexual harassment and abuse.
Being naked is empowering for some, being fully clothed is empowering for others.
The truth is, women have the right to want to turn on whom they want to turn on – and still be treated with respect and care by those whom they don't. Let me break it down for you - Causes of rape: rapists. Causes of harassment: harassers. Causes of objectification: objectifiers. Slut-shaming is harmful to all women's rights. Women's rights are human rights. Human rights are intersectional. By actively participating in slut-shaming, you are actively diminishing human rights.