I hate to break it to you, but it’s not that complicated. If they thought you were the love of their life, they would never, ever do anything to mess it up.
You think they aren’t aware of what they’re doing, or maybe you love them so much that you don’t want to believe it, but the truth is, no matter how complicated things get, when you love someone, you would never risk losing them.
I know your head is spinning with the buts - but they’re going through a bad time, but it didn’t mean anything, but they have issues, but they love me...
But would you ever treat them this way? Would you ever do anything to risk losing them, would you ever make them feel insecure, do anything that you know would hurt them? Would you ever use your issues as a validation for treating them badly? You wouldn’t, I know you wouldn’t, because you love them, because you’re amazing and strong and you need to realize that you can be settling even if you think you love someone.
You think they love you, you think they’re unaware. But they are perfectly aware that texting that person would upset you. They know exactly what they’re doing when they leave communication open with that person and they understand the risk when they flirt with intention and lead people on and have one foot out the door. They know that having backup options isn’t technically cheating, but it’s just as bad, because it means they aren’t sure about you. Because it means they aren’t that crazy about you.
Because it means they are open to letting another person in their heart.
Trust me when I say that they know what you’re not okay with, they know what you would consider being disloyal, and still they cross that line.
Because here is the truth that none of us really want to admit: we start to compromise our relationship when we don’t really care about the person.
They knew that what they did could jeopardize your relationship, and yet, they still did it. That speaks more than anything that they could ever say to you. That should speak to you a million times more than any “I love you” that they say when they’re about to lose you. Because that’s what they do, isn’t it? They say and do anything to get you back, and once they have you, they stop trying. That should be the biggest turn off of all.
That isn’t love. That isn’t your forever person. Because if you need to convince them to adore and appreciate you, you’re with the wrong person.
If you feel like you care more, if they're not making an effort to make you happy, if they aren't consistently giving you a reason to stay, walk away.
Because the right person will look at you. Really look at you, and see your soul and your heart. And once they see it, once they really see you, know you, there’s no way they could ever risk losing you. There is no way they would ever do anything to hurt you. There is an intimacy that starts out with butterflies and a beating heart and develops into magic - the kind that makes us never even want to look the other way because we’re just so happy.
The kind that makes our scars fall in love; because love means not only adoring each others’ charms, but falling madly in love with the parts that the other person thinks are unlovable.
Love is knowing that this won’t happen with anyone else, ever.
Love means never even caring about the so called ‘options’ because you know in your heart you have no desire to be with any other person on the planet because they're just not your person. Love means never wanting to cross that line.
The problem is not that they don’t know what being faithful means. The problem is that they aren’t sure about you. And you shouldn’t waste a second longer being with a person who isn’t sure - life is way too short to be with the wrong person.