He may be shitty, he may be complicated, he may even love you but get caught up in his own securities, but the real reason he keeps disappointing you, is in fact you.
You keep going back, you keep letting him re-enter your life, and you keep making excuses for him.
And I know it’s tough. Ending it is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. You thought you’d grow old with him, and now you have to cut out the person who you love most in this world.
But if you stay, if you keep taking him back, you know it will always end the same way. You know it. Five years from now, if you’re still in the same toxic cycle, you will end up hating him, but more importantly, hating yourself. You will miss out on life changing opportunities, you will lose track of how many girls’ nights he ruined because you were fighting. You’ll regret all those times you weren't in the moment with your family and friends because you spent all your time glued to your phone over thinking, feeling frustrated and sad.
You’ll regret it. I promise you, you’ll regret it.
I know that deep down, you’re afraid of letting him go. You’re afraid to lose him so you hang on tighter. But real love liberates, it doesn’t bind. You can’t lose a real love, a real connection. And he should be the one who’s afraid to lose you. He should build your confidence, not destroy it. The right guy won’t be selfish, he won’t do things that he knows will hurt you, he won’t make you feel like you can lose him, period.
The right guy won’t make you lose out on beautiful moments because you can’t stop worrying about who he’s with, what he’s doing, why he’s not replying.
If you stay in this cycle, you will miss out on so much. You are afraid to let go, and when we are afraid, we pull back from life. It's only when it's true love that we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance.
You’re letting his shitty behavior control your mind and in turn you’re allowing him control of your life. You will never be happy if you’re constantly making excuses for his shit behavior. You will never reach happiness in your life if you stay with a person who constantly drains you.
Eventually that spark, the fire in you, it will burn out. You will abandon yourself in the effort to keep him. You will neglect yourself, your passions, your dreams, because all your energy will be spent on him. Your entire mood and happiness will become exclusively dependent on him.
You won’t know you deserve better because you will fall out of love with yourself.
You never, ever have to feel like that.
You are amazing, you hold the power, and the real problem is that you don’t feel it. The moment you feel it, you will stop going back to him. You will end this toxic cycle because you will feel that you deserve more, so much more.
You are the reason you are unhappy, you are the reason you’re stuck in this relationship and you are the reason he keeps disappointing you. That’s all on you because you choose to go back.
Stop going back to a person that always ends up disappointing you, stop blaming him for your unhappiness because you have the power to leave. You are only responsible for yourself.
Choose yourself, believe in yourself. Start seeing yourself through your own eyes and loving yourself through your own heart and watch your life change as the right person, a more extraordinary person, will enter your life and be worthy of it.